Maintenance Sex

We have all read about and if we are lucky enough even experienced, the amazing sex that creates fireworks in our bodies and minds. Hours of play and fun, of primal arousal. Slow and paced, fast and rough. Intimacy and touch. Mindblowing orgasms. But let’s be honest, it is not always like that. Sex is often awkward and our libidos don’t always match with our partners. It is about finding that perfect moment when everything falls into place. It would be great if that were happening every time anyone initiated sex, but it really doesn’t. In relationships, and especially so in D/s relationships, I think maintenance sex is way more common than the fireworks in your body and mind.

Maintenance sex is sex that helps to maintain the emotional and physical connection between partners in a relationship. It is sex that is not necessarily about overwhelming arousal or mindblowing orgasms. It is sex that is about intimacy, about being together, about making sure that there is still a connection. It is the sort of sex that leaves you smiling and wanting to cuddle. It serves a purpose: to reinforce and deepen the connection between people. And in a D/s relationship, to remind everyone of their roles, and why they enjoy being in that tole.

Lately, I’ve had a lot of maintenance sex. The sort that starts awkwardly, doesn’t last long and still makes me feel more connected to my Master. With all that has been going on with the Covid-19 situation, our mental health has taken a toll. I additionally have been struggling with my mental illnesses and my physical illnesses quite badly. So sex is not the first thing on my mind, and it isn’t on my Master’s mind either. Sure, every now and then, I feel the urge to get off, but a quick masturbation session to get it out of my system seems like the most inviting option. I don’t want to have to think about sex. It is more of a nuisance that my body has those needs.

I miss the physical intimacy though. And the less sex we have, the less submissive I become. It is the sexual play, the foreplay, the painplay, the playing to fight for control, that keeps me on my toes, that reminds me of my submissiveness and why I love submitting to my Master. So to maintain our D/s, and to meet my need for intimacy, I am committing to maintenance sex. If you are in a relationship, and someone asked you how the sex was, and you just go “eh” and shrug, then you have probably had maintenance sex.

It is like I am mildly into it, his cock is half-hard, I could go with either cuddling or sex. When his fingers run up and down my inner thighs, or he squeezes my nipples slightly, I don’t slide into a moaning stage. But I like that he is touching me, I like that he is giving me attention. I like it so much that I am closing my eyes and I wouldn’t mind falling asleep with my head resting on his chest.

Out of habit and with a sort of laziness, his fingers find their way to my cunt. For a second I wonder if I am really up to it, but when his fingers enter my still dry cunt, I enjoy the sensation. I like being the submissive, I like when he just goes for it. And my body is reacting, I can feel myself getting a bit wet as he fucks me with two fingers. But I don’t come. I am just not feeling it. I still enjoy the sensation though. My head on his chest, his fingers in my cunt. He can feel that I am not easy today, so he starts rubbing my clit. He tries it soft but there isn’t much of a reaction, so he gets rougher.

When I am really horny, a few seconds with my clit, and I come. But not this time. I can feel it building it up. I really need to focus though, to get there. And it comes, a teensy tiny orgasm. I feel more relaxed. I would still be okay with just falling asleep with my head on his chest, soft, and warm and close to him. He asks me to lie on my back, and I know that he wants to fuck me. I listen and obey, because I am a submissive. And that side of me gets a bit excited now.

I can please him. I can please him by being available, by giving him pleasure. And as I lie down and spread my legs. I catch a glimpse of his hard cock. I anticipate the sensation of him filling me up, and I really want that right now. “Ready, puppet?” – “Yes, Master”

And he pushes his hard cock into me. I am not very wet so there is a bit of resistance. But I actually like it that way. That he needs to force himself into me. And we fuck. Slow, fast, slow. I watch his reactions, he observes mine. We change positions. He slaps my boobs, he pulls my nipples. My body reacts the way it is supposed to, and I get an orgasm here and there. But no fireworks.

The fireworks are a combination of body and mind. Today, my mind doesn’t really need this. My mind wants to be soothed, wants to be close to him. And there is nothing physically closer than sex. So while the body is getting the small treats of unspectacular orgasms,, the mind is getting soothing through intimacy. He senses that. He also doesn’t feel like the primal wolf he sometimes can turn into. But he wants to come. I want him to come. I want to be a good puppet. So I let him use me, fuck me. He pulls his cock out of me and his seed spreads all over my naked body. I smile. I pleased him. “Good girl.”

After cleaning up, we cuddle. My head rests on his chest, his fingers are playing with my hair. I feel closer to him now. My Master. Maintenance sex is so important when we both need that soothing intimacy, and remind ourselves of the roles in our relationship.

Masturbation Monday

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12 Responses

  1. slave sindee says:

    its always good to be well maintained

  2. Julie says:

    I found myself nodding along to so much of that. Things are very similar in our house. Great post and thanks for sharing, it’s just what I needed to read!

  3. missy says:

    I can relate to so much of this DS. You are right – we do need this 😊

  4. Kayla Lords says:

    My libido fled long before COVID-19 (although that certainly doesn’t help) but I agree with your point about maintenance sex, although I never thought of it in those terms. JB and I have very comfortable, routine sex on almost a schedule, and it keeps us connected even when the last thing I really want is the kind of sexual play we’ve engaged in in the past.

    • Comfortable routine sex is a great way to connect physically and have some moments of intimacy. And once the libido is back, the fireworks will return too!

  5. I don’t have a partner, but I think I need to do maintenance self pleasure for similar reasons as to why you would do maintenance sex. For me, to stay connected with my sexuality and grant myself pleasure I don’t always realise I need.

    I relate to what you’re writing here though, not feeling it like that. There were quite a few times I had that with Lois but I liked that she took it anyway. That it was about her pleasure in those moments and not mine. It made me re-aware of the roles in our dynamic too, which is something that always feels good to me.

    • Maintenance pleasure, yeah, that sounds like something similar: the idea to hold on to your connection with your own sexuality. Totally legit, and I always support masturbation!

  1. April 2, 2020

    […] What comes next is of course the maintenance sex. A hot and horny read and something that is sometimes what is needed. Read it here. […]

  2. April 19, 2020

    […] sex for me. It is pleasurable for my submissive mind because I can give him what he needs. Sex doesn’t have to be all about orgasms and fireworks all the time. I experience low libido in depression, when I am going through a time of high stress and lots of […]

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