A Celebration of Sex Blogging
Seeing that a fantastic meme like Wicked Wednesday is now in its 400th prompt week is a sign of how thriving the sex blogging community is. Let’s be honest, many of the first sex bloggers could have just given up when they got censored by wordpress, and different social media. Instead, they found creative ways to always continue to share their content with each other and the world. And not only that, they shared their knowledge of how to handle the internet’s censorship with new bloggers that wanted to try to blog about sex. Sexual content and open discussions about sex are still being censored everywhere, and even now, in 2020, writing about sex, openly and without restraint, is seen revolutionary by many.
Sex Bloggers Are Needed!
That makes it obvious that sex bloggers are needed. We are educators, we provide a service to the public by spreading information on safe sex practices, on kink and acceptance, on body image, sex at all ages, gender, different sexual orientations and much more. But not only that, most of the members of the sex blogging community are females. And seeing females talking so openly about sex, the beauty of it, the issues of it but most importantly, that women actually enjoy having sex, can make a difference in how society views female sexuality.
But let’s be honest, that is not necessarily why most sex bloggers start blogging about sex. It wasn’t why I started to write about it. I wanted to have an outlet to talk about my D/s relationship, my newly found sexual being, and the fantastic times and confusing issues that I experienced. And seeing that people actually were interested in what I had to say, that they commented and reflected upon what I had to say. I felt like my experiences mattered!
The Sex Blogging Community
So I continued to write, to blog, to share my thoughts. And the reason why this didn’t become one of those millions of abandoned blogs in cyberspace, is the sex blogging community. If you participate in memes like Wicked Wednesday, start reading and commenting on other people’s blogs, and write regularly, you will become part of a supportive community. Everyone in this community seems to be wanting to help each other out. And no, it is not a lie, or a front, people are genuinely that kind. And you might wonder why.
I think the why has to do with that we together can stand stronger against those who want to censor us. But not only that. We all have common interests and common goals. We like sex, and even if we don’t, we like talking about it. A lot of us write erotic fiction, love reading erotic fiction and support each other’s work. It is like it is the community and connection between us all, that makes sexblogging extra fun, extra rewarding.
For me personally, the idea of educating others, actually providing a service of some kind, came way later. I looked into stats, SEOs and views. I realized that people actually came to my blog through search engines and that there was power in social media. And I started to receive messages and emails from people who thanked me for being candid about things, for teaching them something, for bringing up a topic they were too scared to discuss. And then were also those that looked up to me, saw me a sort of role model, someone they would want to be like, and those who loved getting to know the person behind the blog and love to see that I am a real person. Also, last but not least, the lovely messages from those who admit that they got turned on by erotic fiction.
Why I do it now
I know that the sex topics that I write about are very nichey. I don’t talk about loving vanilla sex much, although that seems still to be the kind of sex that the media and Hollywood want to make us believe is desirable. Also, I am not holding back about that I, as a woman, love sex. It might be shocking to some, but yes, being a slut and loving sex is an awesome thing! I feel like I have been able to educate people about kinks, about D/s, and about BDSM sex. Not only about the practices, but also why someone would enjoy doing those things, and how they can make someone feel. So when I write my posts about sex now, I have that in mind too. That there are people out there, who are looking for information, and my text might be the first one they ever read on the topic.
I don’t only talk about fun things though. I also write about mental illness, physical illness, grief, struggles and my thoughts about different things in life. And I know that I stand out there: I am not your average Jane, but I am someone who has to deal with some terrible things on a daily basis. I was first worried that I’d scare people off, bringing those things up. But getting feedback about how I am actually educating people on those topics, and even receiving messages from those that struggle with similar things, has really given me a boost.
Oooh, and then there are the pictures. Sexy, naked, daring pictures of myself. It took me such a long time to feel comfortable sharing those kinds of pictures. And it was not the positive comments on the pictures that made me continue, but the messages that were appreciative of showing another kind of body type, those that told me that they got inspired to take nudes of themselves too. See, I am not a role model of any kind, but if I can make one person feel better about the way that they look, then I am saying yay! And of course I love all the positive comments and I enjoy being creative with taking pictures now as well.
Do it! – A Celebration of Sex Blogging
What I am saying is: if you want to be a sex blogger, and want to talk about sex, write erotic fiction, discuss your relationships, sexuality and gender: do it! Join the sex blogging community, join the memes! Whatever your goal is when starting, one of the positive results will always be that you make other people’s lives better, more interesting or that you at least are educating them. And eventually, if you want to, you might even be able to make money from it, if that is your plan. Or you will get a book published. But really, the best feeling in the world comes from the knowledge that people read what you have written, that they learn something from it and that you have made a connection with another human being.
Because you know, the world needs more people who openly talk about sex and relationships, and who are real about it. Sex bloggers cover all the rainbowy, nasty, naughty, sad, exciting, exhilarating, taboo topics that most glossy magazines and sex ed teachers in schools and colleges fail to address. Being a sex blogger is fun and rewarding. And the celebration of the 400th Wicked Wednesday prompt kind of feels like a celebration of sex blogging to me! So hooray for Wicked Wednesday, hooray for Marie Rebelle, and hooray for all the fabulous sex bloggers out there!
I’ve always loved your posts. Although I do sometimes post about sex, I don’t consider myself a sex blogger since I don’t focus only on sex. I have too many other interests that I wanted to include on my blog, and sex is just one of them.
I can see what you mean there. I have been trying hard to not post about everything I want to talk about, haha. But it is also good to have a focus on my blog, I used to have more general blogs, I ended up with way too many categories š
This is such a wonderful post, and should be shown to everyone who considers starting a sex blog. Yes, we are educators, even if we only write about our own lives. I also didn’t think like that from the beginning, but once I realized that I am helping people out there, once I started getting those thank you messages, I knew I was doing something important. All the sex bloggers are, each in his and her own way. Thank you for writing this, Devie, in celebration of 400 Wicked Wednesdays!
Rebel xox
I am so happy that you reached week 400, here is to another 400! <3
What a great title, I wish I had thought of it first. A great post too, DS.
Thanks, Elliott! <3
This is a perfect post for the prompt! And I agree that ever sex blogger should read it. Iām in a progressive bubble where I live and I often forget that what we do is not widely accepted. Thank you for reminding me of that!š
Oh, I often forget too, that other people just have a lot more limitations in their lives when it comes to expressing their sexual desires, than I do!
Bravo, Deevie. Beautifully said. (You are totally a role model, too!) š
Thank you, Jupi!
Great post! I remember that one of the reasons I started blogging was because of how inspired I was by other bloggers. I wanted to share my story too. I love what comes with blogging (the readers, comments, friends, and community).
Thank you! I definitely think that we all inspire each other all the time.