Fisting – Feeling Fully Controlled

I am in a blissful space. Orgasm after orgasm has already run through my exhausted body. I am wet and spent. But he is determined to push me over the edge, to make me scream and beg for mercy while craving more of what he is doing to me. Pain, oh so much sweet pain. My clit gets tormented to a point where it is unbearable. I try to wiggle out of it but my body doesn’t listen anymore. He owns it now, he owns my body in this moment. And then I fall, deeper and deeper into blissful subspace. My thoughts are not coherent anymore. I whimper now, I moan, but words are impossible to form.

He pushes my legs apart and kneels in front of my cunt. He is not praying to it, oh no, he is preparing to show me how much it belongs to him. One finger easily enters me, two fingers, three fingers. I relax and enjoy the motions, floating in a space where I forever belong to him. In and out, in and out. A fourth finger. I feel full, I feel owned. I am so relaxed. His finger tips touch my cervix but I don’t care. It hurts a bit, it is uncomfortable, it is humiliating. And I am loving it. I am so wet, I can smell myself.

I hear the familiar squish of the lube and jump a bit when I feel the cold gel on and in my cunt. I know what he wants to do. And I relax. I am spread wide open, and I am ready to take it all in. Four fingers and now a thumb joining in. I squirm a little. It is uncomfortable. But also nice. I don’t dare to move. He is in total control. His hand inside me, I am his puppet, he is my Master.

He spreads his fingers inside me and it feels odd. Full but odd. He is trying to ease me up, trying to prepare me for when he forms a fist to fuck me with. And he does, first slow, he pushes his fist inside me. I hold my breath. It hurts, it hurts quite a lot. But more in a dull pressure sort of way. That feeling gets quickly replaced with a sensation of absolute fullness.

As he fucks me with his fist, in and out, I am sliding into a space of absolute pleasure and submission. I truly trust him, I truly want him to do this to me. I can feel a spectacular orgasm build up inside me as he continues to penetrate me, his fist, wrist and parts of his arm sinking into me and pulling out again. I love the roughness of it. I yell “I am going to squirt” and moments later I cover him, myself and everything around us in my naughty juices.

How Fisting works for me

I had never tried out fisting up until this year. I always thought that I wouldn’t be able to take it. I have never had children, and I was just too scared that I wouldn’t be able to spread that wide. It felt like something violent, rough and maybe one step too far for me. We had tried to spread my cunt a bit here and there, with four fingers. And I quite enjoyed the fullness of it. But I couldn’t imagine taking in more than that. As a matter of fact, one of the few times I used the safeword was when my Master tried to fist me and I wasn’t ready. I had to walk to the other room and have a good cry because that was just so very very uncomfortable.

But this summer we finally succeeded, and it was glorious! We were watching a porn movie and we played for two hours before I was able to get to a space where I was able to take his whole fist in. It was an amazing feeling! Fisting has since then not become something that we do regularly, but something that can happen when I slide deep enough into subspace and am totally relaxed.

That is definitely something that I have learnt: fisting is about preparation and being relaxed enough. There are no fisting quickies for me! (Are they a thing for anyone? I need to google this!) The amount of fingers inside me needs to slowly rise, and there needs to be a lot of lube, and coming before we even get started with the fisting part of play. It sounds like a lot of work, but it is worth it because the sensation of being full like that is something else than just penetration with a cock or toys. And it is not only that, there is also a strong element of control to it for me. I totally give up all control when my Master fists me.

I know that many use latex gloves for fisting. While I am not allergic to latex, I am oversensitive to it and I go dry really fast when anything with latex is inside my wet parts. So far it has worked well without using gloves, and I am happy for that. But if you are okay with latex, using gloves is a good way to avoid having nails accidentally scrape you inside your vagina!

Fisting can seem extreme to many. And I can understand that. But if you want to try out something new in the bedroom and you have time on your hands, this might just be a fun addition to play time with your partner(s).